Grief has reared its ugly head this week and somehow become intertwined with family drama.

I feel confident that this spiritual attack has its roots in the reality that Nickapalooza is closing in on us and the list of things to do keeps getting longer and longer even though I spend hours texting, emailing, and talking to people about big and little things like......

band schedules
sound equipment
having enough ice
tents
parking
hot dogs
hot dog sauce
the threat of rain
praying for no rain
funnel cakes
t-shirts
sno-cones
having enough insurance
permits to sell food
cotton candy
nachos and cheese
tarps for speakers in case it rains
lighting

and on and on....

The devil does not want this Saturday to be a success for God. He does not want people being drawn closer to each other and closer to the Lord. He does not want a county praying together.

So, he has done his best to steal my joy even though I've written about keeping the joy of the Lord in my heart. He has done his best to stir up situations in my children's lives that have consumed my emotional energy. He has done his best to distract me from all the things that I should be praying about and kept me worked up about things that only God can work out. He has done his best to stir up my memories of Nick to such a level that I just want to curl up in a ball and cry and cry and cry...................

I really want and need to do that............

And I will..............................

When Nickapalooza is over.

God has a plan. He uses every road we walk for a reason, so I cling to the promise that He truly brings good from all things for those who love Him.

And oh, I do love Him so. He is my everything. My absolute everything.

I've always done my best to be totally transparent with you in my blogs, but this is one of those times when sharing too much could hurt others and that is never my goal in blogging.

Just know that every prayer you whisper for me is felt.

Every promise you claim for me is appreciated.

Thankful that when I am attacked on two sides that I have all of you to join forces and pray the attackers away from every angle from all over the world!

Lord, thank you for my blogging family. What a blessing you have brought into my life. Lord, You are so good. You are my Provider, Comforter, Peacemaker, Shepherd.....truly you are my everything! Thank you. I look to You and You alone at this time of spiritual warfare knowing You are the ultimate victor in all battles! In Jesus' Your precious Son's Name I pray, Amen

Crushed but not destroyed,