Yesterday, I went out on a limb and opened up a little about a very private part of my life.......

My marriage.

I did this because I knew it was time to step out and admit that the one part of my life that has been the most difficult to hold together through all the pain and loss over the years has been my relationship with Tim.

He'd say the same thing if you asked him.

We've had some ugly fights.

We've said some ugly words.

We've held grudges.

We've dug up the past.

We've walked out on each other.

We've pretended everything is good even when it wasn't.

We've mastered fake smiles on many occasions.

But.......

somehow, someway

We've come out on the other side of all our pain

and

we're still together.

We didn't get our earthly miracle with Nick.

(Believe me, this is still the hardest thing in life for us to swallow.)

But, the fact that we are still married is the earthly miracle we did get.

And since I know and believe Nick received the best possible option......

eternity in Heaven - complete healing - no more pain or tears,

I'm learning to be thankful for the earthly miracle God knew we needed.

So, now that it's out......

Now that you know that while my relationship with God has grown stronger and stronger through the years

my relationship with Tim has been more of an up and down series of unfortunate events,

I feel a sense of freedom.

I  learned yesterday through inbox messages and texts that we are not alone in our up and down, high and low, good and bad marriage.

That's what happens when you're honest.

You find out that people all around you are just like you.

Struggling

Hurting

Questioning

Trying

Hoping

And you realize that trying to pretend gets you nowhere fast.

So, when you see me and Tim out and about know this.

We are a messed-up pair of people who love each other in spite of every wrong thing about both of us.

And truly isn't that what love is all about?

Accepting flaws

Forgiving failures

Understanding weaknesses

Admitting mistakes

God is in the love business.

I think that's why the Bible compares the church to the Bride of Christ over and over again.

God knew marriage was work.

And He knows loving the church is work too.

The world is watching Christian marriages.

It's watching because Christian marriages are the closest thing to what God's love for the world looks like.

So, today,

I hope you'll be honest with someone about whatever you're dealing with in life.

In your honesty, I think you'll discover others who have the same pain, the same struggle, the same hurt.

And together you can face things impossible to face alone.

The devil loves to isolate us in our pain.

Honesty scares him, because honesty brings people together.

Where two or three are gathered, the Bible promises that God is also there.

Reach out today.

Be honest today.

It will change everything about tomorrow.......